We had our Thanksgiving last Saturday because my sister Mary is a nurse and has to work. It's not about the day it's about family... and family it was ALL about!!
My family, the *CrAzY* Hill clan.
It takes patience to acquire patience.
Cultivating my virtue is going well. I have had many opportunities in the last week to practice being patient and not letting my anger get the best of me. I know better than to pray for patience because then your life will become like Job. God would have the green light to give you all sorts of opportunities to learn patience. Like I have said before, my lack of patience manifests itself in the form of my anger management issues.
Two Saturdays ago I made a twenty four hour commitment to act calm. This is from the anger control workbook I am using in conjunction with therapy. It was a high stress day where I would be around lots of people at an all day church charity service project and then in the evening I was driving up to D.C. for a church dance. (Road rage and traffic jams are great opportunities to practice and cultivate patience!!) I was really proud of myself, hey I didn't chose humility as my virtue, lmao. Because of my conscious choice to act calm for twenty four hours I was more aware of my wods and actions. There was only one time where I pretty much lost it but it was more restrained than it would have been.
Then last Friday I went to see New Moon with my best friend and my son. It wasn't a good plan. He didn't even make it ten minutes into the movie. I was really upset and angry at the whole situation. In the car on the way home I was talking to my best friend and I shared with her how angry I had been but how proud of myself I was because I was able to be calm and to work through my anger without her even knowing how angry I was. My best friend in the un iverse, the woman who knows me better than I know myself sometimes had NO CLUE how angry I had been because I was able to recoingnize my anger and label it. I then accepted that I was angry, because it's ok to be angry. Then I simply let it go. Kids are kids and there was nothing I could do to change the situation so I didn't dwell on it and moved on.
There are some techniques that help me when I start to get angry. I have to recognize tension in my body. Everyone starts to build tension in different parts of their body when they get angry. Mine is my jaw and my shoulders. So I deliberately relax those areas when I feel them getting tense. I have also started to dig deeper intio my emotions. Instead of just being mad about something I am finding what emotions trigger the anger as a defence mechanism. Deep soothing breaths really work. It helps to slow the heart rate and to relax the body.
I am proud of my progress, so is my best friend and also my therapist. I know I am making small changes that will have a great impact on my future and the person I am becoming.
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